Auditioning...ugh

Why is it that when you don't get a part that you didn't care too much for to begin ith, it hurt likes hell. When you find out the director/casting director 'decided to go another way' it's as if someone says you "you're worthless, useless and there's no point to your life." AHAHAHAHAHHAAHAH perhaps I wasn't cut out for this??????

Ottawa's deadly winter

Can weather really be that big a factor in making me question how much longer I can stay in Ottawa? I think it may just be the perception of warmth and sunshine that has me thinking this way but really when you're walking outside in -25 degrees Celsius and all you can think about is getting indoors, its hard not want to chase the sun....oh palm trees, maybe I was one of you in my past life???

Just Another Day

Impatience, anger, frustration all resonate with me on a daily basis. How do I rid myself of these feelings. It's as though they just brew inside me from the moment I wake up. Is this really who I am or are these emotions trying to tell me I'm off balance and I need to find my way back to calmness and contentment??
I'm hoping my work with MDO (Mood Disorders Ottawa) and YLC (yourlifecounts.org) will tip the scale back to balance:)

http://www.mooddisordersottawa.ca/

http://www.yourlifecounts.org/

A New Me?

Has my short trip to India provided me with some insight I didn't expect to receive? I definitely feel more relaxed and clear headed and the world does seem a bit more positive than when I left. I think experiencing the essence of India has me rethinking and revaluing a lot in my life as well as my innate trait of being cynical. I'm done being so negative about every aspect about my life. I need a change, I need more sunlight in my thoughts:)

A New India

After a 31 hour journey, I made it to Delhi in one piece on December 18th 2010. Its been 4 years since I've been here and I've noticed a difference; it's cleaner. Apparently the city did a major 'clean-up' for the 2010 Commonwealth games which were held here in October. The 30 minute drive from the Indira Gandhi airport to my Aunt's house in Gurgaon was stray-cow-free and I noticed a whole lot more corporate buildings along the Delhi skyline. I always find it funny seeing a big shinning building that says Panasonic or Sony on it in India because you know the people in that building are taking calls from folks like us in North America when we call 'customer service'. However some things remain the same; the severe poverty. It breaks my heart everytime seeing little barefoot children covered in dusty dirt begging for change while a Mercedes Benz goes zipping by. I have no idea how I am going to help eliminate the severe poverty here but I know one day I will be back again for much different reasons.

Changing My Mind

I recently finished reading Changing My Mind by Margaret Trudeau. It was a really captivating story and I was inspired and a little changed by it. I never knew those details about the one time wife of Pierre Trudeau. It take a lot of courage to open up and talk so candidly about one's mental illness. She did a great job. Hats off to Margaret Trudeau.